Monday, bl**dy Monday

So, in response to my friend and former CELTA classmate, Paul, (see the link to his blog), this is what today was like:

8.30am - quick trip to the photocopying shop followed by a paper-cutting session in preparation for my classes.

First class at 9.50am. A relatively late start, but this is a speaking class for 145 mins! One of my smaller classes (averaging around 35 students). They're mostly keen and lots of fun but I know at least one student sneaked out during the break, so I must take the register at the end of class next week...

Lunch with the students in one of the many gourmet canteens on campus.

2.30pm my first year (freshman) speaking class for 90 minutes. They participate well (all 49 of them!), but I still trying to teach them the concept of 'volunteering'. One student invited me to visit his home town and one of the Vietnamese students has invited me round for dinner this weekend.

4.30pm - Chinese class. This time I am the student for a change. Try to look interested and participate, knowing how it feels to be the teacher. Can't help laughing (for the second week running) at the word 'qiche' [car] for its resemblance to the word 'quiche'. I know... I know...

Quick fast food dinner with Russ at the Western restaurant on campus. Two Chinese teachers arrive while we are there and one tells us about her recent trip to Vietnam, Cambodia and Thailand, promoting the university.

7.30pm - last class of the day. This is an extra speaking class to prepare some students for the forthcoming university inspection. Only 20 students in this class, which soooooo good. We finish the lesson by miming various things, including 'I'm getting married', 'You've lost weight' and 'I'm hungry'. Much over-acting on my part and much giggling on the students' part.

Probably my busiest day, but I enjoyed all of it.

I've worked out how to add links...

If you could kindly direct your eyes to the right of this page... Yes, I know, everyone else has been doing it for ages!

Today:

1. Breakfast / early lunch of cheeseburger & chips at French Café.
2. Death-defying trip back on my Chinese bicycle.
3. Lesson planning.
4. Piano playing in a Chinese English teacher's apartment.
5. Trip downtown with aforementioned teacher to purchase piano music.
6. Across-the-bridge-noodles in strange Chinese chain noodle restaurant.
7. Slightly random, though vaguely successful clothes shopping venture.
8. Dodgy dance film at groovy arts venue.
9. Discussion about western dance class for tomorrow.
10. Numerous fights with blood-hungry mosquitoes.
11. Bed.

Adios!

Chinese roads

I just found this on a website about riding round China on a bike: http://www.draginrun.com/4-13%20thru%2023_Beijing_to_Changchun.htm

Acknowledgement and thanks to Gary Morgan for his extremely accurate description of China's roads:

"China's Rules of the Road (submitted by Gary Morgan)

Traveling on Chinese roads is an hallucinatory experience of movement, color, sound and emotions. It is frequently heart-rending, sometimes hilarious, mostly exhilarating, always unforgettable -- and, when you are on the roads, extremely dangerous. Most Chinese drivers observe a version of the Rules of the Road based on an Jiaguwen, or Oracle Bone Script.

ARTICLE I

· The assumption of immortality is required of all road users.

ARTICLE II

· Chinese traffic, like Chinese society, is structured on a strict caste system. The following precedence must be accorded at all times. In descending order, give way to: ducks, chickens, official cars, heavy trucks, buses, camels, light trucks, sheep, jeeps, ox-carts, horses, private cars, motorcycles, scooters, auto-rickshaws, pigs, pedal rickshaws, goats, bicycles (goods-carrying), fowl, handcarts, bicycles (passenger-carrying), dogs and, last of all, pedestrians.

ARTICLE III

· All wheeled vehicles shall be driven in accordance with the maxim: to slow is to falter, to brake is to fail, to stop is defeat. This is the Chinese driver’s mantra.

ARTICLE IV: Use of horn (also known as the sonic fender or aural amulet):

· Cars (IV,1,a-c): Short blasts (urgent) indicate supremacy, that is, in clearing dogs, auto-rickshaws and pedestrians from the intended path.

· Long blasts (desperate) denote supplication, that is, to an oncoming truck: "I am going too fast to stop, so unless you slow down we shall both die!" In extreme cases this may be accompanied by flashing of headlights (frantic).

· Single blast (casual) means: "I have seen someone out of China's 1.3 billion people whom I recognize" or "There is a bird in the road (which at this speed could go through my windscreen)" or "I have not blown my horn for several minutes.

· "Trucks and buses (IV,2,a): All horn signals have the same meaning, viz: "I have an all-up weight of approximately 12.5 tones and have no intention of stopping, even if I could." This signal may be emphasized by the use of flashing headlights.

· Article IV remains subject to the provision of Order of Precedence in Article II above.

ARTICLE V

· For all maneuvers, use of the horn and evasive action shall be left until the last possible moment.

ARTICLE VI

· In the absence of seat belts (which there is), car occupants shall wear Buddhist Mala bracelets (commonly referred to as 'power' beads). These bracelets should be kept securely fastened at all times. (See Articles I and X). Optional are wedding license plate covers.

ARTICLE VII:

· Rights of way (VII,1): Traffic entering a road from the right has priority. So has traffic from the left, and also traffic in the middle.

· Lane discipline (VII,2): All Chinese traffic at all times and irrespective of direction of travel shall occupy the centre of the road.

ARTICLE VIII

· Roundabouts: China has no roundabouts. Apparent traffic islands in the middle of crossroads have no traffic management function. Any other impression should be ignored.

ARTICLE IX

· Overtaking is mandatory. Every moving vehicle is required to overtake every other moving vehicle, irrespective of whether it has just overtaken you. Overtaking should only be undertaken in suitable conditions, such as in the face of oncoming traffic, on blind bends, at junctions and in the middle of villages/city centers. No more than five centimeters should be allowed between your vehicle and the one you are passing -- and no more than two point five centimeters clearance in the case of bicycles or pedestrians. To make eye contact with an 'opposing' driver is to concede the road.

ARTICLE X

· Nirvana may be obtained through the head-on crash.

ARTICLE XI

· Reversing: no longer applicable since no vehicle in China seems to have a reverse gear."

Dog is not just for Christmas...

So, over 1,600km there and back, a 25hr train journey, a bus, a taxi, a plane and another taxi and I am back from Pingxiang! Yippee!!!

As I explained, I had been invited back by a friend of Rick's (and now also mine), to spend National Holiday with him and his family. National Holiday is very much a family occasion and very important in the Chinese year. Steven and Rose and their respective families included me very warmly in all their celebrations and it was a crazy and fascinating (if a little tiring) week.

I took the train there to save money and also to see the countryside. The journey went very smoothly and I read for most of it, but it was a little frustrating not to be able to communicate with the others in my compartment (6 beds, known as a 'hard sleeper'), as they all seemed very friendly. As usual they shared their food with me.

We passed through some amazing countryside (and some slightly less amazing countryside!) Rounded, tree-covered hills, tumbling rivers, rice stalks stacked up in the fields, corn on the cob threaded together to dry out, water buffalo working in the fields...

So, what did I do? I went for many, many meals at the houses of various relatives, including Steven's parents in Shanli and Steven's grandparents somewhere deep in the countryside. We took a car most of the way and walked the last bit up a dirt path. It was there that I had my first taste or what is normally thought of as a pet. [If you're not following, look at the title of this post]. Climbed Wugong Mountain for the second time with Joseph (works in the library at Pingxiang College) and two Chinese boys, Tony & David, both of whom speak very good English. We climbed the mountain in 2 hours, which is quite quick, and I spend the rest of the week nursing very stiff legs as a result. [Not the best in any circumstances, but when the only toilets available as those of the 'squat' variety, it makes going for a pee a painful experience!] One of the pictures is of the 'hotel' we stayed in. For 'hotel' read 'wooden hut with beds in it'.

Went to a random person's wedding party (friend of Rose's). Got stared at. A LOT. Pingxiang is much worse than Kunming for that. Although I did amuse myself by saying 'Ni hao' [hello] to anyone who stared for too long. The first night there I did this to someone and he was deeply shocked, much to Rose's amusement. Haha. Drank lots of beer and some baijuo (strong rice wine) - thanks Rick! Met up with some of Rick's former students at Pingxiang College. The college has grown quite a lot since I was there last year and looks quite different. I even bumped into Bob [recruits foreign teachers], who asked me as usual if I knew anyone who wanted to come and teach at the college!

So much happened, I don't really know where to start or to finish. I am really glad I went. Kunming is great in lots of ways, and I'm glad to be living here. It's somewhat 'easier' to live here than in Pingxiang. However, I know that if I go to Pingxiang and see Steven etc., I get to experience the 'real' China.

Maybe one day Rose & Steven will visit Britain and I can repay the favour. They're very keen to and I hope they do!

Coming back, I took the aeroplane. Partly because it was difficult to get a train ticket coming back and partly to save time. I took a bus from Pingxiang to Changsha and ended up sitting next to a Chinese girl who teaches English in Pingixiang - someone else to put in my e-mail address book. She helped me sort out a taxi from the bus station to the airport (easier than another bus as I was short of time!) Flying back took just 1 hour 40 mins. Much easier, but you miss out on the whole train experience and seeing the change in scenery etc.

Well, I am currently sitting in my pyjamas writing this, even though it is only 5.15pm. I am nursing a cold, a sore throat and and aching wisdom tooth - sympathy please! However, it has stopped raining, Wikipedia works again here and my last class of the week is tomorrow morning.

Mustn't grumble...